dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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