Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
