ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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