i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I would ride that face into the sunset
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
