Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
