the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
