ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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