He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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