He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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