He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
ok first of all what the fuck
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
