Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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