What did we do last night that was yellow?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
