So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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