i just google imaged poop.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
