It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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