did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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