what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
