If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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