Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
