The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize