im drinking this country out of the recession.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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