Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
