Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
