I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
pray to the hookup gods
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
