How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
