All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
