so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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