We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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