the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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