she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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