Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
