I think scott just propositioned me for sex
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
