i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize