Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
okay pat passed out under dana's car
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
