is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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