Don't make out with my wife yet
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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