i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
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