My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
