i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
