FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
