The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
