Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It's Friday. Sex?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
