Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You are the jesus of drinking
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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