i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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