brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
