Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
