Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize