Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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