he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
she pinky promised me she was 18
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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