Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
